So You Want To Teach In Saipan?

The spring hiring season is approaching for most school districts, and if you are attending an education job fair in Oregon or Minneapolis any time soon you may come across a booth that advertises sandy beaches and ocean views. The people will be extremely nice and will likely offer you a keychain or water bottle as you complete your application and schedule your interview. No, CNMI does not stand for "C-Something, N-Something Military Institute", it stands for the Commonwealth of the Northern Mariana Islands. After you hand in your application and conduct your interview, you will likely have many questions dancing in your head about this place, as it is 7,000 miles away from the United States and you've likely never heard of it until the job fair. I've been here for the better part of one school year, and here are some answers to questions you may have:

"What's it like living in Saipan?"

This is difficult to answer in a few sentences. It's 85 degrees every day, it rains for about an hour two or three times per week, almost everyone speaks English, and they use the US Dollar. If you're a glass half-full person, you'll love it. If you're a glass half-empty person, well...you'd better really like the ocean. If you're a very active outdoorsy-type who likes to go on hikes, snorkel, ride mountain bikes, and play sports, this is a great place to be.

"How much does it cost to live in Saipan?"

Housing is ridiculously cheap. I have a decent sized 2BR apartment that overlooks the ocean, and that's on a teacher's salary. You can get by very cheap ($250/mo for some places), but I'm of the opinion that it's worth spending a bit more to have a great view. Everything besides housing, however, is more expensive than in The States. Food: Everything from staples such as milk/OJ/bread/butter to quick eats like McDonald's and Subway is 20-50% more expensive here. No dollar menu, no $5 footlongs. OJ is $6 for a half gallon, and I think milk is about the same. Almost everything has to be shipped here from outside sources, hence the cost. Gas: $4.45/gallon, however the longest drive in Saipan would be about 12 miles one way so it's not a huge issue. Insurance is cheap and there is no sales tax or federal income tax (hey now!), so everything kind of evens out.

"What are some of the positives and negatives of living in Saipan?"

+The aforementioned lack of taxes, cheap housing, VERY laid back attitude
-Laid back attitude = gross inefficiency
+Access to any number of beach or ocean-related activities
-No malls, no large grocery stores...not many things here are "convenient", but you get used to it
+Tropical weather is grossly underrated during December, January, February, and March
-Flights to and from Saipan are not cheap, regardless of your destination. Example: To fly from Saipan to Thailand (a couple thousand miles) is the same price as flying from Minneapolis to Thailand (10,000 miles). Flights aren't cheap, so if you think you'll be able to have access to a ton of places once you're out here, well, you'd better be set up with a trust fund.
+Cheap golf on nice courses with amazing views, and they're almost always empty.
+World Class Snorkeling and Scuba Diving.

"What is teaching like in Saipan?"

Like most places it depends on the particular school you are at. Some schools are run well, some are not. The universal themes which apply to all schools here are, once again, good and bad.

The good:

+Students have more respect for teachers here than ANYWHERE in The States. Seriously, the biggest classroom management issue you might run into is a kid talking out of turn, and even then he'll apologize immediately.

+Teachers here are treated like gold. Everyone holds them in high esteem and their eyes light up when you tell them "I teach at (such-and-such school)", as they undoubtedly know someone at the school. In fact, teachers here are kind of like celebrities...kids will run up to you at department stores just to say hi.

+Laid back lifestyle: Autonomy. As a teacher you can get away with quite a bit more here than you can in most districts in The States. Want to go outside for a class period? Go. Want to go on a field trip? No biggie. Want to go off-topic for days at a time? Have fun.

The Bad:

-There is a lack of support at almost every turn. You are the janitor for your classroom, you are likely the toilet paper supplier for students who need to use the bathroom, you are judge/jury/executioner when it comes to almost everything that happens in your classrooms, and if you are having issues with student attendance it falls on YOU to contact parents, etc. Indeed, it is a bit more in-class work than in the U.S., however it's not too much to handle.

-If you are looking for supplies, paint for your room, furniture, or equipment...good luck. If they have a spare extension cord laying around you'll likely have to fight for it, and if the projector bulb goes out, well...let's hope you have printed copies of that Powerpoint, because it will be weeks and months (if ever) before your projector is back up and running. That brings me to my last point:

-Funding here is a major issue. Classroom supplies often come out of the teacher's pocket. I know what you're thinking..."that happens in the U.S. too". My response: Do any teachers in the U.S. have to buy paint, a mop + bucket, and toilet paper for their classrooms? Again, you're dealing with the bare-bones here. The stipend for coaching a sport is $300 (about 1/10th of what it is in the U.S.), and even that may be going away soon. There is constant chatter that at some point the district will run out of money and will be unable to pay teachers, however almost everyone here thinks that that sentiment is nonsense. Still...good to know.

"I've made up my mind and I'm coming out there. Do you have any advice for when I first get to Saipan?"

Save your money up until the day you get here. Your first paycheck doesn't show up for 5-6 weeks, and before that time you'll need to pay for rent +security deposit, food, entertainment/etc, and transportation. Used cars out here are more expensive than in the U.S., so be prepared to spend $4K-$5K if you want something remotely "nice". I bought a 92 Camry when I got here. Almost nothing electrical works, you can only open one door from the outside, and I have to keep one of the windows held up with tape. Almost everyone agrees I got a steal of a deal for $1000. I'm not joking. You can rent a scooter for $150/month, however it rains quite a bit here from July to November, so plan on getting wet every day. There is no public transportation on the island, so no sense in holding out for a cheap bus pass. Hippie.

When you first get here you'll be nickled and dimed to death. $50 for a Tuberculosis test. $35 for an application fee for your CNMI teaching license (note: both of these need to be done before you can teach). $30 for a local drivers license (you need it...trust me), $30 for a P.O. Box, deposits for your apartment, power, cell phone service/internet, etc. I'm not saying you need to roll here with $5,000 cash in order to make it, but don't show up with $50 in your wallet thinking that you'll be fine. $2k-$3k ensures that you'll be able to make a comfortable move out here.

A few quick things for Saipan noobs:

-Rent a car, scooter, or find a ride to the school district's central office on your first full day in Saipan. They will have things for you to do/sign/initial, and the earlier you get those things done, the better. If you wait until the school year starts you will be too busy to handle these things and will likely have to take a day off just to catch up. No bueno.

-Go to marianasliving.com to get an idea of what kind of apartments are available out here. When you land here the school will put you up at a hotel for a few days. Call Cherry from Marianas Living (her # is on their website) and have her show you apartments...she knows just about everyone on this island and the process for setting up power/water/etc.

-Get a P.O. Box on your first day here. You'll need it for when you apply for electricity, a cell phone, a drivers license, etc. Most people I know have their PO Box at Quick Print on Middle Road.

-Get a drivers license on your first day here. You'll need it for just about everything, and the local discount out here can be dramatic.

-I have my cell phone service through IT & E and my bank account through Bank of Guam (make sure you sign up for BOTH an ATM card and Check Card if you go there). I highly recommend both.

One last thing: 85 and Sunny never, ever gets old.

Until the next one...

It Feels Good To Be The Villain Sometimes

Some harvests are different from others. One may have a combine, others a scythe, others still a sharpened stick and a canoe. The harvest never ends when you have a machete, though, as you can see above. Indeed, I have bananas today. And tomorrow. And...

I was lucky enough to be chosen as a chaperone for Japanese exchange students and their Marianas High School counterparts to the island of Managaha. Managaha is the burial site of a Carolinian leader named Chief Aghurubw, and it also happens to be a ridiculously gorgeous island filled with equal parts white sandy beach, the coolest-looking water in Saipan (it's within the lagoon but far away from land, hence no pollution at all), and jungle. To the island!!!!

The "Al Bundy" pose with Saipan as a backdrop...I'm just now starting to develop a tan. Seriously though, it was odd seeing Saipan from even a thousand feet away. You can see nearly the entire island from Managaha, which is confusing and hilarious at the same time. I'd rank it somewhere in between seeing a mirror in a mirror in a mirror and seeing earth from space. Quite humbling to know that my place of residence can be easily crushed by any four year-old with decent perspective and an ability to pinch his or her fingers together.

This tree is in the middle of the island and serves as a counterpoint to what you've been taught regarding tree/branch/root structures. The friggin' thing has like...legs growing into the ground! This is a few feet away from the Chief's tomb, however that will have to be a picture for another time as they are taking quite awhile to load this evening and I have more to share with ya'll.

Your "oh yeah, they fought a war there" pic of the week. I can't blame the Japanese artillery dudes for this one. I mean...if you had to hang out by a huge gun all day long, wouldn't you want this view?

In school-related news, I'm making the transition from psychology to sociology very soon...I hope my students can make the connection between the two, and more importantly, to their lives. It's difficult to think that kids who can barely grasp verb conjugation and proper grammar will absorb some of the abstract concepts I teach, however there are choice moments of clarity which make it all worthwhile. For instance, I am smack dab in the middle of teaching a "Personality and Behavior" unit, and I asked the kids a few questions:

Me: "Do any of you have a problem with your mom or dad? Specifically, if you're a girl, do you fight alot with your mom? If you're a boy, do you fight alot with your dad?"

Students: (various shouts of acknowledgement, almost every hand in the class is up)

Me: "Well, it's a good thing that you're sitting right now, because here's some news for you: you're probably going to become exactly like your parents someday"

Student A: "NOOOOOOOOOOOO! I'm never going to be like them, mister!"

Me: Give it ten years, maybe fifteen. It will happen"

Student A: "I'm never going to be like my parents! Never!"

Me: "That's exactly what I said when I was your age"

Student A: "But I'm different. I'm not like everyone else who becomes their parents!"

Me: "I said that too when I was your age"

Student A: "But..."

Student B (interrupting): "I'm almost already like my mom. I don't want it to be true, but it is"

Me: "Exactly. It's just a fact of life"

Student A: "But I'm different...I swear, mister!"

Me: "Were you born as a human being. I mean, no reincarnation, no alien monkeybusiness, no black magic...you had a natural birth?"

Student A: "Yes mister!"

Me: "Then you'll likely be like your parents...it's that easy"

Student A: "But what if I don't like my parents?"

Me: "You will"

I recently went over the 5k hit mark on this site. If you don't think I check the numbers on a consistent basis, well, you don't know me that well. Seriously, though, I am humbled by the amount of people who visit this site...please start commenting! Let me know what you want to see from the island, I'll get a pic for you!

Photo of the bus bench near my crib? Photo of a bus bench near my crib. Check the graffiti, son!

Ok, ok, ok...one more for the people in MN who had a snowstorm blow through recently. This is Managaha from a distance, the place where I spent Monday "at work":

BWA-HA-HA-HA-HAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!! Until the next one...

When All You Have Is What You Have

Quick thoughts from the island...with only one photo. Those are some Mangos which I will be enjoying in short order. The skin is uneatable, which is to say that if you eat it, you'll be in some sort of gastro-intestinal hell. The innards, however, are the fountain of youth.

-Glad to see the MN gubernatorial race in a dead heat. Nothing says "why we can't we all just get along" more than a split decision heading into a recount. For those of you whom are invested in politics, let this be a lesson: There are as many people in this world that disagree with you that agree with you. It's a beautiful thing, really.

-If you check the Saipan Tribune's website and fish around for a bit you'll see my prognostication vis a vis the World Series (Not sure of the publish date...check 10/29 and 10/30). Glad to know I can pick a winner from a few thousand miles away.

-I miss my people. My grandma sent me a b-day card...I'm 31 for Christ's sake. I miss her. I miss my brother and my sister-in-law and Bug like crazy. They sent me a B-Day box with a dope shirt and some non-perishibles. So did my folks. So did my sister, brother-in-law, E-Unit, and Crash. I miss hanging out at the Winchester (Roddy's). I miss weekends in Siren. I miss regrettable weeknight excursions in South MPLS with LT and/or KC and Bekah. I miss regrettable weeknight motorcycle rides with Slade. I miss regrettable weekend nights in Stilly. I miss my aunts, my uncles, my cousins. I miss the NSP, and everyone who grew up on 18th,19th, and Helen. I miss the 2312 crew. I miss random "what are you doing? nothing? I'm on my way over" evenings on Orange Ave on the East Side. I miss Sundays on the couch watching football all day in The Swag Palace. I miss all of it.

-I am absolutely more qualified than Brad Effing Childress to be the head coach of the Vikings. X's and O's may go a certain distance on the field, but pissing away a 3rd round draft pick for 4 mostly unproductive weeks from a Wide Receiver is not a good trade. I'll say it again: It's never too late to become a fan of the Pittsburgh Steelers. If someone can create a "Saipan to the Super Bowl" marketing campaign that results in me being hired as a coach, I promise that I'll get you a cushy job in the organization.

-One for the road: I've been teaching psychology for the last two months and we've just gotten into the 'Sleep and Dreams' unit. My students are finally excited about something in class, and it's easy to realize why: If you think about dreams and what they may mean (www.dreammoods.com), you will automatically put yourself into a position to dream more. I have no idea why, but since I've been preaching the different interpretations of dreams I can't stop myself from having them. So here's my challenge to you: Take the two most recent dreams you have had along with the two recurrent dreams you have had earlier in your life (don't be cool about it; we all have had them) and find out the meanings of them on the website. The meanings may not be accurate (again, it's an interpretation of your dream), but the very act of thinking about them will kick-start something in your head and you'll start dreaming more. Crazy stuff.

Until the next one...Mahalo.

Ten Days Left

Have you ever played the "if you were going to a deserted island and could only take (x number) of things, what would you take? Well, I'm leaving for Saipan in ten days and I'm smack dab in the middle of that game, only this time it's real. As it stands, I'll be taking the following bags onto my flights:

-1 Carry-on

-1 Suitcase

-1 Hard-sided golf travel bag w/clubs

As one cannot fit much into those three bags, it's time to decide what I'll absolutely need and what I can live without. As it stands, here's what I'm bringing:

-MacBook Pro

-Panasonic Digital Camera

-Asus EEE PC Netbook

-Ipod Touch

-Clothes

-Four books on teaching

That's it. 30 years of my life's acquisitions boiled down to a couple of fucking computers, something that takes pictures, something that plays music, and clothing. Wow.

Anyhow, on Saturday, August 21st I will be jumping on a plane and heading to Houston, then Tokyo, then Guam before finally landing in Saipan. I'll be there for two years (save for next summer), teaching at Cha Cha Oceanview Junior High School. I'll be posting anything I think you folks back in MN might find interesting on this site. You can also befriend me on Facebook, where I'll be storing a decent amount of photos from my time on the island. As this post was essentially just a "test", you can expect something a bit less "blah" next time.

Until then...